Showing posts with label husband. Show all posts
Showing posts with label husband. Show all posts

Friday, November 15, 2019

Use Your Words: How to test your marriage. part 305





Hey-O friends!
Today’s post is a writing challenge created by Karen @ Baking in A Tornado.  8 participating bloggers picked 4 – 6 words for someone else to use in a post. All words must be used at least once. All posts will be different as each writer has received their own original set of words. No blogger knows who received their words or in what direction the writer will take them. Until today.   

My words are: sustainable ~ various ~ coping mechanism ~ slanted ~ raccoon ~ circus
They were submitted by the very creative Jenniy @
https://climaxedtheblog.blogspot.com               
                     
Oh, friends. If you've read this blog for a long time you know that I like to change things up a bit in my home every now-and-then. If it's something simple like painting or moving furniture, I do it myself. If it's more difficult (ala plumbing, electrical or heavy-lifting,) I ask the man for his assistance. This time, I wanted to update our main bathroom. The room is a bit awkward, as it also houses our laundry.  So, I brought it up to the man.

He's silent for a minute (this is him recalling every circus-like remodel we've ever done) and then clenches his jaw together while talking to me which lets me know he'd rather have his teeth pulled than deal with another update. We both want our house to be sustainable for years, but neither of us has the energy anymore. "What will it entail?", he asks.

My List:
1. Paint
2. A new sink top
3. Maybe do something with the dingy floor? (not sure) 
Three things. That's it. At most: 1 trip to Lowes.
Time frame: 1 long weekend

(insert all of the experts and the good Lord above laughing in unison.)

We enlisted our son to help take out all of the room's hardware so we could remove the doors.
We had to move the washer/dryer so I could paint.
Easy enough.

What really happened to my ridiculously naive list: 



Clearing out the bathroom/ when we had hope.

1. Remove the sink top and notice the stained wall and soft bottom of the sink cabinet.

2. Remove the top part of the CABINET and realize the hot water pipes have leaked down the wall and into the floorboards.

3. Remove the corroded pipes and realize they haven't been checked since...the year the man was born? Good heavens people, after I saw the connecters, I doubted everything I've ever known that was good in the world.
The actual hot water connection. There's not enough CLR in the land to help this pipe out.

4. Cry. Assess the damage and hit Lowes.

5.  Lowes for paint, primer, pipes, connectors, and a TOTAL SINK. Remember that our existing toilet has a surface crack in the bowl, so we proactively buy a new one. Who has two thumbs and gets excited for a flipping sale on toilets? This girl.

6. Ask the man to remind me to write about the LAST toilet we installed...

7. During the hook up of new pipes, we assess that the people who laid the existing tile did NOT, in fact, tile under the sink. And the floorboards under the sink are slanted. The floor would need to be replaced.

8. Lowes trip # 2 -  Pickup wallboards, new plywood, a faucet for the NEW SINK, and tiling materials; which should be easy right? (insert more tears). Add to the list mortarboard, grout, tiles, de hazer, mud, (oh yeah, they don't have enough of the tile we chose), and a scraper blade to "pop-up" the existing tiles.

9. Replace sink pipes and decided to start chipping up the tiles, since nothing can happen until we have a floor. Use the scraper. And a hammer. And a sledgehammer. 'Seems the people that lived here previously were either reigning tile champions, or have successfully buried bodies in cement, because that stuff would. not. move.

10. Home Depot this time, to rent a hammer drill. I can't express the frustration we possessed trying to tear up that floor. The tiles merely chipped and all of the mortarboards turned to dust. I'm sure I mentioned that we removed the doors right? Enter everything in my home covered in dirt.

11.  Take a day off to contemplate buying a new home. Perhaps one with an outhouse.

12. Home Depot trip #2 to exchange for a LARGER hammer drill that eventually does a satisfactory job.
all hope and happiness is gone

13. We are five days in and the man and I don't know how we ever loved each other. He huffs and puffs when i move and I can't stand the sight of his dusty-a$$ed jeans. Frustration leads to bickering and nothing makes it better until he mentions ice cream. That's right. Frozen dairy reunites us once again. Mint-chocolate-chip-tasting is totally a coping mechanism, right?

14. Day 6: we have to temporarily move the laundry back to the hook-ups because, oh, I don't know... I have spoiled my boys into not making their underclothes last? Hey, there ARE ways.
still hopeless, but smelling April-fresh.


15. Yeah. STEP FIFTEEN! Would you like to see the finished project? Um, so would we. We are at a standstill while the man does his real job and my grandson wants to go shopping. I'd much rather buy fruity pebbles, stuffed raccoons, and various Legos at Target, than trip over one more sample of porcelain tile.

Wish us luck/Pray for our marriage/Pray for our souls.

Have a wonderful weekend, friends, free from DIY projects or HGTV.
-Michele

Don't forget to check out the other amazing bloggers and see what they've come up with!               
They were submitted by:

 Climaxed                                             

Friday, May 24, 2019

Fly On The Wall May 2019: Young at Heart

Welcome to the May Fly on the Wall Group Challenge. This month, 5  bloggers and I are describing what it would be like if you were to take a peek inside our homes...


Have a "look" around mine, and then go visit the other blogger's pages. There's always something fun, sentimental, or better yet, embarrassing going on. It's like your house, only we're admitting to the craziness. You have our permission. Buzz on over!

The cast:
Mark: the man
Me
Alex: Oldest daughter
J.: The teenager
Christian: son (21)
3 grandkids :)

Young at Heart:
***
I'm not sure if it's because the man and I are now grandparents, or if we've always been this way, but I've decided the adults in our family often act like kids; in the best way.
Here are a few examples from the blur that has been Spring:

After Easter, I found a 12-pack of Bunny Ears that I forgot to use. Mark and I, our three kids and 3 grandkids put them on (because, BUNNY EARS!) After 5 minutes, the little ones and the teenager (not cool, man!) took theirs off. The adults, however, kept them on for the remainder of the night. One of us almost wore hers to bed.


Only serious adults wear Bunny Ears.

***
For a million reasons, I haven't been back to my hometown in years. A lot has been going on back there, so Mark and I decided to fly out to Michigan for a short 48 hours. For health reasons, I haven't enjoyed making that long flight. Mark surprised me and upgraded our tickets to first class. WooHoo! Although I'd like to think it was for me...


Priorities
Mark: "Isn't this nice? Watch closely as I put this tea away and enjoy 17 Bloody Marys". 

For me, having a restroom so close and being able to move around made the flight much more pleasant. I'm sure that the other "regular first-classers" weren't thrilled to watch Mark and I trade up our pretzels and almonds like they were marbles or golden treasures. 
Me: (later, out loud) "A warm washcloth and Ben and Jerry's for dessert? Where has first-class been all my life?"
***
Even though our time at home was short, I was able to accomplish most of what I came for. Including stopping at my childhood mall to see if the large bronze hippopotamus still existed. And it did. It's the little things, people.

Priorities 

***
Me: (Yelling downstairs) "Hey Mark? Can you help me move this desk?
Mark: "Yes, in about an hour. I have some things to finish up with work."
The teenager: (5 seconds later)"Hey Dad? How does this video game work again?"
(all I hear is running)

Priorities

***
Our foster granddaughter's birthday party fell on Mother's Day. I asked my daughter if she was okay celebrating it at our house on that day. She was thrilled. Plus, I promised the granddaughter a dinosaur cake. I wasn't able to find a "dinosaur bones" mold, even though I swore they existed. Five craft stores and one disappointed grandma later,  Christian used some fondant and created the bones. He's the real MVP. I'll always be amazed at the incredible abilities of my children.


I put crushed cookies and graham crackers on top so the kids could go looking for bones. Mark and I figured the granddaughter would love it since he and I had so much fun trying it out first.

They seemed to like the cake!

She found the bones and the boys ate them.

***
See that small table in the bottom right corner of the next pic? That was for the grandkids. Notice that they aren't at any table during the birthday craft time. Instead, the rest of us (minus the teenager) were engrossed in coloring wood dinosaurs.



***
The culmination of the day was to be a "paleontologist" and carefully break open an egg (made of plaster) to find a toy dinosaur inside. It was 10 times harder than any of us thought. We eventually opened all of the eggs, but it was a ton of work. Alex's face says it all.
"Thanks, mom, for this super fun idea."

***
Mark made a run to the store and asked if I needed anything. I told him I'd love a candy bar. I know I shouldn't eat them, but I'm weak, man!
Mark: "What kind do you want?"
Me: "I don't care. Just something chocolate."
After shaking his head at my indecision, he left for the store and returned with a big smile. He poured out a bag of various chocolates as if whatever he brought home would be wrong.
Trying not to take offense, I look at the pile. 
With the most serious face, I ask, "Where are the Almond Joys??"

Again people, priorities. 


Are you young at heart? Let me know in the comments.
Have a sweet weekend, friends. 
-Michele

Buzz on over and visit other participants of this month's Fly :)


                  Baking in a Tornado
                  Never Ever Give Up Hope
                  Menopausal Mother
                  Spatulas on Parade
                  Bookworm in the Kitchen


Friday, April 17, 2015

Fly on the Wall: April 2015

Hey-O!  Welcome to the April Fly on the Wall Group Challenge. This month, 14 amazing bloggers and I are describing what it would be like if you were to take a peek inside our homes....



Have a "look" around mine, and then go visit the other blogger's pages. There's always something fun, sentimental, or better yet, embarrassing going on. It's like your house, only we're admitting to the craziness. You have our permission. Buzz on over!


Cast:
Me
The man
Alex, the eldest (daughter, 21) 
C., The middle (son, 16)
J., The youngest (son, 10)
Lila and Henry, the dogs
***

It will be a breeze...

That's what the man and I said when we decided to take down the playhouse that's been in our backyard for 10+ years. We had a week off for Spring Break and figured this would only take a day or so. Holy Hannah, people. We were so wrong. 
So. So. Wrong. (This story is getting its own blog post.)
For now, here's a picture of the result:
Yep, that's a dumpster. Full of a playhouse.
Easter:

It was a really good day. Those of you familiar with my struggles with depression can understand how big this was for me.

Alex and her husband spent the night before coloring eggs with us.

After all of these years, I still Google the directions on boiling eggs.



I would show you all of the colorful, finished eggs, but Alex was ready for deviled eggs. These are my Pinterest-FAIL chicks. Eh, they were still delicious.

After church, Alex and her man came over for brunch. The weather was gorgeous. We were able to sit outside and eat in the sun. I may have mentioned this before. But when my children are wrapped around my table; when they are laughing at everything and nothing at all, I am at my happiest. My whole world was right in front of me. My heart was full.


The best laugh of the day was watching my children; all grown with their lanky bodies, pushing each other over to grab up plastic Easter eggs. There was yelling and pouting, racing and hiding. That was just the married kids. All for candy-filled plastic eggs. OK, so we may have mentioned the cash hidden in some of them...

The rest of the month was busy. Alex is finishing up her last few weeks of college. C. is cramming for his AP finals and J. is enjoying the rest of his fourth grade year. Other than J., I have to keep up with the others via text. Here are some of my favorite ones:

Texting with the kids:

Me to Alex: "I'm going to have to go ahead and agree with you. That woman has issues."
Alex: "So does Satan."
***
Alex to Me:"Do you have the recipe for your buttered noodles?
Me: "Yep. Are you ready? Cook noodles. Add butter."
***
Me to Alex: "I have a conundrum. I want to be a good citizen and all-around nice person,  but I also want to punch someone in the face."
Alex: "That's easy. Voo-doo Dolls. Can someone say, "Craft night?"
***
C. (from work): "Some person dropped an entire case of beer and I had to take it to the back, so if I come home smelling like Bud Lite, um, that's why."
***
Texting with my friends:

Me: I'm going on Tuesday for the Colonoscopy.
Friend #1: "I hope everything comes out all right!"
Friend #2 "That's a pretty crappy situation."
Friend #3 "Good Luck today! (with the poop emoji.)
***
Me to my Forever Friend: "I was flipping through channels earlier and saw the movie "Flowers in the Attic." I immediately thought of you. How old were we when we read those awful things?"
F.F.: "We had to be twelve. I can't believe we got away with reading that trash! I heard the movies are pretty cheesy."
Me: "They are. So I recorded all four."
FF: "Yes! Our poor kids. They'll never be able to remember such things. What will they say to their kids? 'Hey, remember when our moms let us go to the mail box by ourselves? Remember watching that rated PG movie?'"
Me: 'Hey, remember that time we went down the stairs without holding onto the railing?'
Our grand kids will probably be wrapped in cotton and bubble wrap. Rebels.

Finally:

We took the dogs for their yearly physicals. While they had lost a bit of weight, it wasn't enough to make the vet happy. He explained (again) to me that I'm not showing love to the dogs by giving them extra food. I nodded, knowing that's exactly what I do.

Out in the car:
The man: (patting his stomach) "Did you see the vet look at me while he was talking to you about food not equalling love? I swear he was looking at me."
Me: "Oh, that's not true. He's an animal doctor. He could care less how we look. Now let's get home. I just made you an apple pie."
***

Thanks once again for reading. Thanks also to the Fly's AMAZING creator, Karen @ Baking In a Tornado, aka "The Blogging Original", for hosting this challenge! Would you like to join in the next FLY challenge? Click on the FLY button on my side bar. Karen will  take care of you.
Take a look at what the other bloggers have going on inside their homes. Go on! Leave them a comment. You know you want to!


Baking In A Tornado                          
Spatulas on Parade                          
Follow me home                           
Menopausal Mother                          
Stacy Sews and Schools                        
Battered Hope                                   
Just A Little Nutty                                 
The Momisodes                                        
Someone Else’s Genius                            
Disneyland in Kentucky                                
Searching for Sanity                    
Sanity Waiting to Happen                                
The Sadder But Wiser Girl                             
Dinosaur Superhero Mommy                                   
Juicebox Confession                       

Happy Friday, friends!
-Michele

Friday, December 19, 2014

Fly on the Wall: December 2014

Hey there!  Welcome to the December Fly on the Wall Group Challenge. This month, 14 amazing bloggers and I are describing what it would be like if you were to take a peek inside our homes....



Have a "look" around mine, and then go visit the other blogger's pages. There's always something fun, sentimental, or better yet, embarrassing going on. It's like your house, only we're admitting to the craziness. You have our permission. Buzz on over!

Cast:
The man
Alex, the eldest (daughter, 21) 
C., The middle (son, 16)
J., The youngest (son, 10)
Henry and Lila- The dogs

Making the Olive Garden all it can be:
Alex to the Man (both are breadstick lovers): "You know what they need, Dad? They need a buzzer. When we get to that last breadstick, when our hand just touches it, the waitstaff should hear a buzz."
The Man: "Yes! Once we lift the breadstick to our mouths, the buzzers should become louder and louder, like a warning signal."
J: "Yeah! They could give off electric shocks!
Alex: "Wow. That escalated quickly...But, it might just work."

Naiveté you say?
I went with the teenager to pick my youngest up from school. There were four kids in the in front of us and they were playing instruments. IN THE CAR!
Me to the teenager: "Isn't that the oddest thing? What kind of teens play clarinets in their car?"
My son: (rolling his eyes) "None. Mom. Those are NOT clarinets. Those are hookahs."
I looked it up. He was right. I'm 100 years old.

Christmas time is near:
After 10 years, I finally run out of wrapping paper. Now, my husband's Christmas present looks like he will be celebrating his sweet 16. Or his diamond anniversary.

***
Alex to me: "Mom, I really didn't think this through."
Me: "What?"
Alex: "Being married. I just realized I won't wake up here on Christmas morning! I don't know if I'm ready for that."
Me: "Well, you two are welcome to sleep overnight here on Christmas Eve."
Alex: (relieved) "Oh. Okay!"
Me: "Um, don't you want to talk it over with your husband, first?"
Alex: "Why?"
***
Go, you chicken fat, go away:

We changed the dog's vat-o-food bucket to tiny, individual bowls. We're feeding them twice a day and walking with them each morning. Poor Lila. She loves to walk. She loves the whole pomp and circumstance of getting her leash, putting her coat in her teeth, getting to the door, and heading out. First though, I have to put on her coat. Each time, I velcro the first piece around her neck and she pants at me like we're BFFs. It's not until I go to put the large velcro attachment around her belly that she looks away. Each time, it's still a bit taut. She won't make eye contact with me. It's like I'm not even in the room. Once on, Lila heads out the door like nothing shameful has happened. We have the same soul. Together, we're going to work on it.

Not related: New lesson learned: Don't stuff stockings with dog treats and expect the stockings to neatly stay in their place.
Lila: "I'm not ready to talk about my figure right now. I am willing to talk about bacon, though."
Henry felt left out of the photo session.

Finally:

A fly on the wall would have seen me beaming with pride over the people up in that photo. The kid in the plaid has been singing his heart out in his school choir. The girl in pink? She just put away another successful semester of college. The young man in the tux just finished his winter band concert and was elected president of his high school's MESA program. The man? He holds us all up. I've said it a million times, the accolades are awesome, but the fact that those people up there are kind, supportive AND hilarious? Well, that makes my world go 'round.

Happy holidays, friends  :)
-Michele

Fly on over and check out all of this month's participants:

Baking in a Tornado                          
Just a Little Nutty                                
The Momisodes                                          
Spatulas on Parade                          
The Sadder but Wiser Girl                                   
Follow Me Home                           
Stacy Sews and Schools                 
Menopausal Mother                          
Battered Hope                            
Dinosaur Superhero Mommy                                 
Juicebox Confession                    
Risa Nye                                     
The Bergham's Life Chronicles               
Cluttered Genius                                    
              

Friday, October 17, 2014

Fly on the Wall: October 2014

Hey there!  Welcome to the October Fly on the Wall Group Challenge. This month, 12 awesome bloggers and I are describing what it would be like if you were to take a peek inside our homes....



Have a "look" around mine, and then go visit the other blogger's pages. There's always something fun, sentimental, or better yet, embarrassing going on. It's like your house, only we're admitting to the craziness. You have our permission. Buzz on over!



Why is your dame moving her lips?

All right, I don't WANT to chalk this up to living in Utah, but I just don't know anymore. If you look up feminism and our state in the news as of late, you're going to find some very passionate articles. Read a few if you get a chance and then we can discuss.

I know this doesn't happen EVERY where here, but I swear to you, I'm a magnet for sexism.

My current (actually, ongoing) issue is with salesmen. It doesn't matter if I'm buying an appliance, a car, or in today's instance, furniture. It always starts the same way. Without fail, the salesmen comes up to us, but only looks my husband in the eyes.
Salesman: (staring at Mark) "Can I help you folks with something?"
Mark: (pointing to me) "Well, we gave our living room furniture to our daughter, so we're looking for some new stuff."
Salesman: (to Mark) "Are you looking for anything in particular?"
Mark: (again, pointing to me). "I have no idea. Michele has done most of the research. I'm leaving it up to her."
Salesman: (rocking back and forth on his heels, with his hands in his pockets, he leans once again towards Mark) "Well, what does the little lady like?"

Sweet father of upholstery. What year is this? Will this man's short-sleeve shirt and clip-on tie begin to melt if he has to look at me? I could have been holding a huge wad of hundred dollar bills whilst pointing to a sofa and I'd bet that salesman would have slapped me on the behind and asked me to make him a drink. 

When the last salesperson saw the disgust in my eyes, he turned away from me and whispered to Mark in a, 'You poor man. You've got one of THOSE women..' faces and said in a singsong voice, "You know what they say! Happy Wife, Happy Life! "
If I had one of the man parts required to speak to these guys, I would have pulled it out and beat them with it. But then, I may have messed up my pretty dress.

Three furniture stores. Each out of huge sales. Each getting a letter to the highest ranking female I can find.

Long story short, we found our living room set at an out-of-the way non big-box furniture place. Mark sat down on a comfy sofa while I picked out what I wanted, arranged for the delivery and paid the bill. Guess what? My uterus didn't even fall out.


My cute new stuff.
Photo property of DownEast Home


Some things never change:
I was scanning over an article I had written for a friend's blog forever and a day ago. Life got in the way, so it didn't get posted. In it, I was listing 25 things I'm always nagging my children about. The funny thing is, the list still works today. ALL OF IT. 
SO, I'm sharing it.. Any month of the year, a FLY could hear me yelling saying these things: (If you visit this blog often, you'll already be somewhat familiar with the list.)

1. Did you brush your teeth today?
2. When was the last time you got in the shower?
3. Where are you going now?
4. When will you be home?
5. Who ate my candy bar?
6. How long have you actually had to finish the assignment that’s due tomorrow?
7. Will a how-to meeting help our family learn to replace toilet paper?
8. Why are you hoarding wet towels?
9. Where is your pillowcase?
10. Where are all of my forks?
11. Are you really going to wear that?
12. Where’s your jacket/scarf/coat/boots?
13. Can you tell me this story in 30 words or less?
14. What were you thinking?
15. Who hit who first?
16. Why did you say that to your brother?
17. Why did you do that to your sister?
18. Do I look pleased?
19. Do I care what your friends get to do?
20. Did anyone in the public witness this?
21. Did you say “Thank You”?
22. Did you say you were sorry?
23.  Where did you get THAT idea?
24. What is that smell?
25. For the love of all that is holy, WHY?

More quotes from random family members:

"Come to our house. If we're not crafting or eating, we're yelling. All of those things are fun to witness."

"If you're giving away the sofas, are they perhaps being accompanied by the side tables as well?"

"At the checkout I found a bag of Jolly Rancher Lolly pops. I was instantly disappointed. Who wouldn't name those things Jolly Pops? I would buy those in a heartbeat. I mean, I bought them any way, but I'd do it again with a smile on my face." 

"Are we ever going to eat the shrimp in the freezer or are they just going to become one with the ice?"

"I'm not here to say 'Hi', I just need a fork."

"Send that sleep-machine back. The white noise sound makes me think that someone's going to tell CarolAnn to stay away from the light."

"Sure mom. We promise to help clean-up after 'craft night'."
Mmm hmm.
They didn't keep their promise. The project coming together here will be in a new post on Tuesday. Stop by to check it out :)


Go visit the other crazy kids participating in the October Fly :)
Happy Friday, Friends!


Baking in a Tornado                          
The Rowdy Baker                                  
Just a Little Nutty                                
The Momisodes                                          
Spatulas on Parade                          
The Sadder But Wiser Girl                                   
Follow Me Home                          
Stacy Sews and Schools                 
Menopausal Mother                          
Battered Hope                            
Dinosaur Superhero Mommy                         
Someone Else's Genius                
Crumpets and Bollocks