Have a "look" around mine, and then go visit the other blogger's pages. There's always something fun, sentimental, or better yet, embarrassing going on. It's like your house, only we're admitting to the craziness. You have our permission. Buzz on over!
Cast:
The man
A., the eldest (daughter, 20)
C., The middle (son, 15)
J., The youngest (son, 9)
Henry and Lila- The dogs
We weren't in the house much. I'm assuming flies follow our family. It's probably the smell.
Trip to the Beach:
It was beautiful and warm. I counted every blessing while we were there. Getting away; hearing the ocean at night; feeling the sand between my toes. I was in heaven. It was good for my soul.
The Lego Movie:
We saw it. We loved it. Morgan Freeman completes me.
The man and I were bumping each other and talking about our favorite parts of the movie. There were many.
C. and J. :"Um, Mom? Dad? Remember us? We came with you!"
The man: (looking at me and laughing) "Oh yeah. That's right. We brought kids. Get in the car, I guess we'll take you home."
The man: "No problem. We only had to dip a little into your college fund for the concessions."
C. : (nervously) "You dipped into my college fund?"
The man to me: "College fund? What college fund??"
We simultaneously laugh for the next ten seconds…
J. : "C. is helping me sort Legos by color!"
Me: "Can I help?"
C.: "I don't know, Mom. You always get crazy over this stuff."
Me.: What are you talking about? That's mean!"
C. : "Never mind. Here." He moves, makes a space for me, and explains the process."
Me: (after about ten minutes of sorting,) "Hey. Don't you think we should put the boxes in order of color? ROY G. BIV any one? Where do the clear ones go? This piece is white and blue. Where does IT go? Why aren't the green pieces in a green box? Shouldn't there be a separate box for characters? Wheels HAVE to go in another box, right?."
J. is puzzled and C. is shaking his head. I decide to leave.
Let's all make fun of mom:
C: "Mom needs a swear jar."
J. "Mom needs to put money in the jar every time she eats sugar."
A. "Gather round, my family. If this works, we're going to Disneyland!"
A. to me after I run to the mailbox in my bare feet: "Show-off. We all can't have reptile feet."
C. "Mom. Yeah, what happened? Your feet look like webbed-duck feet."
Me: "If dad and I ever get divorced, he's getting full custody."
The man: "HEY! Not so fast!."
A.: "I remember when I was small, I thought the moon followed me."
C.: "When I was little I thought giraffes were really tall horses."
J.: "I thought EL-em-en-O-P was one letter."
Me: "When I was in first grade, I ate paste."
Pause. My whole family got up and left.
February 12th:
If you read this blog, you KNOW that I count my love of chocolate somewhere in-between the love of my three kids. (I won't say the exact order). You also know that in my world, candy makes everything better. You break a dish? You buy me a candy bar and all is forgotten. You are fifteen minutes past your curfew but you have a box of Sourpatch Kids? I lost my watch. Dog poops on the floor but he's bringing you a box of Mike and Ikes? I smell nothing. You get the picture.
You can imagine my anticipation for the 14th of this month. There is a drill. We practice three or four days before. I sit quietly as my family lines up, bearing the gifts of their search. Roses? Set them aside please. Construction paper cards? I will read (and cherish them) in a moment. Boxes of chocolate. There we go. Turtles, chocolate coffee and Junior Mints. Yes. A giant chocolate statue of me? Don't mind if I do.
And so I wait. We have to take a day off of practice so I can go to a doctor's appointment. I don't mind. I think the family has the candy run under control…
If you truly believe in Karma,
If you get the saying, "Be careful what you wish for." If you think to yourself, "Damn that lady. she gets everything she wants. Who needs THAT much chocolate?" "She should get diabetes!"
Okay, you're (hopefully) not THAT mean. Maybe just wishing for a little "Insulin Resistance."
I say to you people, "Couldn't you wish for that any other time of the year?"
Indeed, I have a metabolic syndrome which is forcing me to "radically change my diet". (Doctor's words). I looked at her like she was talking to someone else. Perhaps she messed up paper work. Maybe she's mixing up the February holiday with April Fool's Day. Lots of other things were said this day, but I couldn't focus on any of them. I lost my ability to speak. I envisioned those chocolate treats swirling above my head like sugarplums.
"When does this diet have to start? How long do I have to do it?" I ask incredulously.
"Yesterday and forever." Says the cruel woman in a white lab coat.
Valentine's Day was much like a funeral. People still brought their pre-purchased gifts of sugar love and handed them to me with heads bowed. I had to smile. But I couldn't.
I have walked by the shrine of treats for days. Sneaking tiny pieces here and there until the box of Turtles was gone. What am I supposed to do? Don't answer that. Dang.
Any one up for a partial box of chocolates?
Thanks once again for stopping by, and to the Fly's AMAZING creator, Karen @ Baking In a Tornado, aka "The Blogging Original", for hosting this challenge! Would you like to join in the next FLY challenge? Click on the FLY button on my side bar. Karen will more than take care of you.
We weren't in the house much. I'm assuming flies follow our family. It's probably the smell.
Trip to the Beach:
It was beautiful and warm. I counted every blessing while we were there. Getting away; hearing the ocean at night; feeling the sand between my toes. I was in heaven. It was good for my soul.
Hours before, we were looking at a foot of snow in our yard. It's amazing how you can go from that to feeling the warm sun on your skin.
I got punked by a bird. I felt so sorry for him! I tried to dig in my purse for something to feed this one-legged flyer. Look how he is balancing that round belly on just one little stick leg! It's like me in tree pose.
I step closer. With tears welling in my eyes, I close in. Just like that, the chubby feathered animal popped out his other leg and laughed at me. They all laughed at me.
I suppressed my cravings for eating poultry. That day.
***
On the way home, I got the middle seat. I tried to be friendly to the man beside me. (The other side). He wanted no part of my company.
I tell my husband about him at the airport.
Me: "That guy was grouchy."
The man: "He probably didn't want to be bothered."
Me: "I offered him some of my Red Vines. He rolled his evil eyes at me."
The man: "Why would he take your licorice? He didn't know you. He didn't know where your hands have been…"
Me: "Where my hands have been? They've been in a bag of Red Vines! Geesh."
We saw it. We loved it. Morgan Freeman completes me.
The man and I were bumping each other and talking about our favorite parts of the movie. There were many.
C. and J. :"Um, Mom? Dad? Remember us? We came with you!"
The man: (looking at me and laughing) "Oh yeah. That's right. We brought kids. Get in the car, I guess we'll take you home."
***
C. : "Thanks for the movie. And the treats. That coke was huge!"The man: "No problem. We only had to dip a little into your college fund for the concessions."
C. : (nervously) "You dipped into my college fund?"
The man to me: "College fund? What college fund??"
We simultaneously laugh for the next ten seconds…
***
Me: " (Walking into the boys' room,) "What are you doing?"J. : "C. is helping me sort Legos by color!"
Me: "Can I help?"
C.: "I don't know, Mom. You always get crazy over this stuff."
Me.: What are you talking about? That's mean!"
C. : "Never mind. Here." He moves, makes a space for me, and explains the process."
Me: (after about ten minutes of sorting,) "Hey. Don't you think we should put the boxes in order of color? ROY G. BIV any one? Where do the clear ones go? This piece is white and blue. Where does IT go? Why aren't the green pieces in a green box? Shouldn't there be a separate box for characters? Wheels HAVE to go in another box, right?."
J. is puzzled and C. is shaking his head. I decide to leave.
Dark green and light green in the same box? I can't work under these conditions.
Let's all make fun of mom:
C: "Mom needs a swear jar."
J. "Mom needs to put money in the jar every time she eats sugar."
A. "Gather round, my family. If this works, we're going to Disneyland!"
***
A. to me after I run to the mailbox in my bare feet: "Show-off. We all can't have reptile feet."
C. "Mom. Yeah, what happened? Your feet look like webbed-duck feet."
Me: "If dad and I ever get divorced, he's getting full custody."
The man: "HEY! Not so fast!."
***
We were laughing one night at dinner talking about silly stuff we used to do:A.: "I remember when I was small, I thought the moon followed me."
C.: "When I was little I thought giraffes were really tall horses."
J.: "I thought EL-em-en-O-P was one letter."
Me: "When I was in first grade, I ate paste."
Pause. My whole family got up and left.
I refuse to think paste was made from any animal. At least the paste I ate.
After a few days, I wake up to this:
It's a Glue Factory. I'm sorry, PETA.
February 12th:
If you read this blog, you KNOW that I count my love of chocolate somewhere in-between the love of my three kids. (I won't say the exact order). You also know that in my world, candy makes everything better. You break a dish? You buy me a candy bar and all is forgotten. You are fifteen minutes past your curfew but you have a box of Sourpatch Kids? I lost my watch. Dog poops on the floor but he's bringing you a box of Mike and Ikes? I smell nothing. You get the picture.
You can imagine my anticipation for the 14th of this month. There is a drill. We practice three or four days before. I sit quietly as my family lines up, bearing the gifts of their search. Roses? Set them aside please. Construction paper cards? I will read (and cherish them) in a moment. Boxes of chocolate. There we go. Turtles, chocolate coffee and Junior Mints. Yes. A giant chocolate statue of me? Don't mind if I do.
And so I wait. We have to take a day off of practice so I can go to a doctor's appointment. I don't mind. I think the family has the candy run under control…
If you truly believe in Karma,
If you get the saying, "Be careful what you wish for." If you think to yourself, "Damn that lady. she gets everything she wants. Who needs THAT much chocolate?" "She should get diabetes!"
Okay, you're (hopefully) not THAT mean. Maybe just wishing for a little "Insulin Resistance."
I say to you people, "Couldn't you wish for that any other time of the year?"
Indeed, I have a metabolic syndrome which is forcing me to "radically change my diet". (Doctor's words). I looked at her like she was talking to someone else. Perhaps she messed up paper work. Maybe she's mixing up the February holiday with April Fool's Day. Lots of other things were said this day, but I couldn't focus on any of them. I lost my ability to speak. I envisioned those chocolate treats swirling above my head like sugarplums.
"When does this diet have to start? How long do I have to do it?" I ask incredulously.
"Yesterday and forever." Says the cruel woman in a white lab coat.
Valentine's Day was much like a funeral. People still brought their pre-purchased gifts of sugar love and handed them to me with heads bowed. I had to smile. But I couldn't.
I have walked by the shrine of treats for days. Sneaking tiny pieces here and there until the box of Turtles was gone. What am I supposed to do? Don't answer that. Dang.
Any one up for a partial box of chocolates?
Thanks once again for stopping by, and to the Fly's AMAZING creator, Karen @ Baking In a Tornado, aka "The Blogging Original", for hosting this challenge! Would you like to join in the next FLY challenge? Click on the FLY button on my side bar. Karen will more than take care of you.
Take a look at what the other bloggers have going on inside their homes. Go on! Leave them a comment. You know you want to...
Stay sweet, my friends :)
-Michele
