The Cool Kids

Friday, January 17, 2020

Use Your Words January 2020: The Skimpy

Hey-O friends!

Today’s post is a writing challenge created by Karen @ Baking in A Tornado.  9 participating bloggers picked 4 – 6 words for someone else to use in a post. All words must be used at least once. All posts will be different as each writer has received their own original set of words. No blogger knows who received their words or in what direction the writer will take them. Until today.  

My words are:
meatballs ~ wrapping paper ~ Hamilton ~ Game Show Network ~ bathroom
They were submitted by: 
Thanks for the words, Twinnie!

Pattern Story #12: Infomercial
Property of Butterick Pattern Service 1980s

Are you tired of the kids always stealing your towels?
Can you be sure that the towel on the floor is really clean?
Are your bathrobes at the cleaners?

Well, fret no more, grown-ups. Because now you can adorn yourself with 'The Skimpy.'

'The Skimpy' is just that. A scant piece of terrycloth that magically wraps around your body and snaps at your chest or waist. It covers just enough to keep your nosy neighbors from seeing your bits, while still keeping you and/or your man looking stylish.

'The Skimpy' can be worn at any time of the day!
You'll want to wear it:
* In the morning, before or after your shower.
* When you get home from work.
* When those pesky kids spill meatballs on your yoga pants.
* Even when you're staying in for the night and want something comfortable to wear while watching The Game Show Network!

Do you find yourself stumbling from your bathroom with no idea of what to wear?
Try 'The Skimpy!'
Are you looking for something to put on before you get ready for your child's school's version of "Hamilton?"
Try 'The Skimpy!'

Usually, 'The Skimpy' can be purchased for $1000.00. We're not selling it today for one thousand dollars. Not $500, or even the fabulous price of $100!!!
'The Skimpy' is available to YOU during the next 30 minutes only, for the low, low price of $29.99!

But wait! There's more!

Order two and we'll send you the second 'The Skimpy' for only $19.95! We'll even monogram your 'The Skimpy' for a small additional fee. 

It. Just. Doesn't. Stop.!

Order in the next 30 minutes and we'll even package your order in our famous Infomercial wrapping paper! Ask your operator for other unbelievable deals on 'The Skimpy' accessories. You'll be given our special pricing on hair wraps and spa sandals!

Remember, regular towels can belong to anyone. Bathrobes can be heavy and difficult to tie. 'The Skimpy,' will let everyone know you make your own choices in pre-clothing, and your choice is 'The Skimpy.'

Call us for your own 'The Skimpy' right now!
Dial 1-800-IM NAKED and tell the operator you're ready to wrap yourself up in 'The Skimpy.'

Have a "dry" weekend, friends!

Don't forget to check out the cool kids who participated this month:

                        Baking in a Tornado
                        Spatulas on Parade
                        Wandering Web Designer
                        Southern Beller Charm
                        Part-Time Working Hockey Mom   
                        Medicated Musings
                        On the Border     


  1. If I still had teenagers I'd buy one and wear it TO their production of Hamilton.
    Actually, maybe I'll buy one anyway. I think the neighbors are sick of catching glimpses of my bits.

    1. See. you and I have the same thoughts! I told Mark that we should get matching ones and show up to Christian's college graduation wearing them! What's a little embarrassment (or is it pride?) to a 22 year old?

  2. Wow, I was ready to place my Skimpy order as soon as I saw how much fun the models were having in that picture on the pattern envelope, and even more so after reading about all the other benefits. I must say that the Skimpy makers do need to up their game a bit and provide for online ordering, otherwise they are missing out on a huge market! At least they have a memorable 1-800 number, but who actually calls phone numbers these days? Thanks for another entertaining story and lots of laughs. Can't wait to read the next one while lounging in my new Skimpy! Love, M

    1. Did you catch that the pattern was from the 80's? A phone call might have been just enough back then. But don't you worry dear husband. I'm making our family matching ones this month. Notice in the pattern that the couple has the same monogram? Good heavens. <3

  3. Oh my gosh today is a winner! I just left Karen's post and Diane's loved them both so much. Then I head over hear and I swear to goodness I can hear that announcer in my head and I'm almost convinced I need to call and order a Skimpy! Great job and so much fun.
    Dawn aka Spatulas On Parade

    1. Dawn, I was saying the same thing after your snowman story! This was a great week of posts! Can you imagine having to pose for that pattern? All I could hear in my mind was "Bom Chicka Wow Wow" type sex-ay music. Ha! <3

  4. I'm dying!!! ;-)))
    I want my monogrammed Skimpy plus the slippers, wrapped in the iconic Infomercial wrapping paper...
    Happy Weekend!

    1. Will there be xtra shipping to your country? LOL You can have it all! <3

  5. LOVE!!! I'm picturing you and the Man lounging around the house in your monogrammed Skimpies right now! Fabulous! I'm sure the teenagers will love it! LOL. Thanks for another good laugh, my gorgeous girl! xoxo

    1. Just thinking of Mark in a Skimpy makes me laugh; monogramed, even better! Hope you are well, dear friend <3

  6. Is there a link for me to purchase this?? Because I’m sold! AND monogrammed?! Matching family Skimpy’s? Heck yes!! I was just googling “how to be fashionable whilst wearing a snap towel”.. This post was meant for ME! 🤣 love you!! Thanks for the giggles.

    1. You da best. That is all. ps. Look for a package coming your way from Skimpy Inc.

  7. This is absolutely AH-MAZE-ING, Twinnie! I love how you used those words and I could see this being an actual infomercial.
    You’re so awesome!

    1. I need you to do the voice over for me, girl! Thanks for the super-great words! <3

  8. i laughed through this whole thing. the dog got tired of being disturbed and hopped down. haha. thanks for that!

    1. Jenniy, I'm so glad to see your comment! Happy you liked it, but sorry about your dog getting bothered <3 BTW, I cannot stop thinking about the utensil-stealing "troll" you wrote about, I think it should be in a printed storybook.


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