-A mostly true journey of a girl, her man and their three kids; all trying to live harmoniously in a house somewhere in Utah. Names and exact locations may be changed in order to protect the grouchy.

Friday, June 21, 2013

Fly On the Wall- June!


Hey-O!  Welcome to the June Fly on the Wall Group Challenge. This month, 11 awesome bloggers and I are describing what it would be like if you were to take a peek inside our homes....



Have a "look" around mine, and then go visit the other blogger's pages. There's always something fun, sentimental, or better yet, embarrassing going on.. It's like your house, only we're admitting to the craziness. You have our permission. Get in there!

Cast:
Me
The man
A., the eldest (daughter, 19)
C., The middle (son, 15)
J., The youngest (son, 8)
Our dogs: Lila and Henry

Father's Day:

Me: (continuing on with our tradition of breakfast in bed...) "Would you like pancakes? How about an omelet? French toast?
The man: "Wow, any of those sound great."
Me: "Good, get up. We're going to Denny's."
***
Me: "Did you finish Dad's card? What does it say?"
J.: "Lots of things. Mostly that he's the best dad I've ever had."
A. "The best? Who was your second best dad?"
J:  (looking at me, confused) "Huh?"
Me: "Yeah, I'm not touching that."

The dogs:

J: "Mom, you're going to be SO mad at Henry..."
Me: "Do NOT tell me he peed on your floor.. I spent the whole day steam-cleaning that carpet!"
J: "He didn't pee....He pooped."
Me: (running up the stairs) "You've got to be kidding me!"
J: "Nope. Not kidding...(following me to continue his tattling) and I think he ate crayons. It's rainbow poop!"
***
A.: "Henry peed on the kitchen floor last night. It was kind of funny. It was an exact straight line; it went on forever."
Me: "What? Did you stop him and put him outside?"
A.:  "I cleaned it up, but I didn't stop him.  He just kept going. And going. Straight as an arrow. It was incredible."

*** 
Me: (getting very close to Henry's cute, little face). "If you keep peeing on my floor, I'm going to have to take that little "thing"of yours off..."
The Man: "Aw. Welcome to our home, Henry. You're family now."

Keepin' Up the House:

The man: "Are we going to keep these paint chips pinned to the wall forever? They're all over the house."
Me: "I'm waiting to see which ones I like. I have to see them in the light during all times of the day."
The man: "Are you waiting to see how they look in the light of all four seasons?"
***
Me: "Are you planning on fixing the fireplace anytime soon?"
The man: "It's summer, woman!"
Me: "That's what you said last summer." (We're go-getters, people.)
***
Me: "I'm cleaning out the freezer in the garage. This is the time, and I can't believe I'm saying this, but you guys have 48 hours to eat the rest of the twin pops and ice cream sandwiches. After that, everything gets thrown out."
J: (racing his brother, sister AND dad to the garage door) "This is the best day of my whole life!"

That Awkward Moment:

-When you're hanging out on your bed with your daughter. You have wet hair and a mud mask on. She has braided her hair and has her retainer in. You're both in sweats and sharing a 1 pound box of fudge. You're doing this whilst making fun of "Toddlers and Tiaras," which is blaring on the TV. "Who watches this crap?" one of you asks.  Neither answers, nor do either of you change the channel. For two hours.

-When you find out that your 15 year old, who is staying with his awesome grandparents so he can attend an art camp, has been allowed to buy throwing knives. Three of them. In the midst of your fit-throwing, the boy gives you the aforementioned 1 pound box of fudge. Like that's going to make you forget. Hmm? What were you saying, again?

-When you ask who forgot to flush the toilet and everyone says, "It wasn't me". Your youngest then says, "Well, I don't think it was me. What does it look like?" Yeah, that.

Finally, the text conversation winner for June:

C. (the 15 year old, from his grandparents' house):  I just witnessed a horse getting castrated. #scarredforlife."
Me: What? Where?
C.:  In the barn. Grandpa called the vet over to neuter one of his stallions.
Me: Gross!
C.: I'll send you a picture if you'd like.
Me: Um, no thanks. I'm eating.
C. : Your loss.
Me : I'm broken hearted over it.
C. : I'm feeling queasy.
Me: I hope you don't have meatballs for dinner.
C. :No chance. Had them last night. BTW, these are actually white.
Me: Ack! TMI.
C. The vet had to use a razor blade. He had to cut twice.
Me: Well, that makes sense. Poor horse.
C: Don't worry, they gave it a shot. It just fell over. It's knocked out.
Me: That's the way to do it, I guess. Hey, I thought you'd be sleeping by now. It is summer vacation!
C. Nope, I will never sleep again!
Me: Nightmares! You better wear your long pants to bed.
C.: I think you missed the part about me NEVER sleeping.
Me: I think this is the perfect inspiration for your art. Haha!
C: No wonder Van Gogh cut off his own ear.


Thanks once again for stopping by, and to the Fly's AMAZING creator, Karen @ Baking In a Tornado, aka "The lady who celebrated her one year blogiversary!", for hosting this challenge! Would you like to join in the next FLY challenge? Click on the FLY button on my side bar. Karen will more than take care of you.

Take a look at what the other bloggers have going on inside their homes. Go do it! Leave them a comment. You know you want to...


Just a Little Nutty                               
Follow Me Home                      
Stacy Sews and Schools                  
The Sadder but Wiser Girl                      
Menopausal Mother                  
Moore Organized Mayhem                 
The Insomniac's Dream                       
The Momisodes                                
Evil Joy Speaks

Happy "There's No Place Like Home" Day, friends :)
-Michele



26 comments:

  1. ROFLOL!! LOOOOVE IT!!
    We had to do the freezer clean out twice in the past 7 months. The kids were in HEAVEN!
    But 3 turkeys in that amount of time can be WAY too much.... ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I can't even imagine defrosting 3 turkeys! My freezer was more snow and ice than food!

      Delete
  2. LOLOLOLOLOL! I can't decide which is my favorite!

    I've never had rainbow poop from the dog which eats everything. Should I feel left out?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No rainbow poop? Give me your address. I'm sending crayons to you; the ones with sparkles. Hey, if you're going to have poop lying around, it might as well be pretty. Henry (the little dog) eats everything. I wouldn't be surprised if he pooped out plastic silverware.

      Delete
  3. Awesome!!
    Sometimes it's a box o fudge kind of day... glad you had such great company.
    I'm totally going to have to try that Denny's trick. ;)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Every day is a box o fudge day, Meg! LOL. All of the years that we work hard for breakfast in bed. All it took was a drive down the street and I didn't have to do dishes. How did so many years pass without me figuring that one out?

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  4. I keep telling my husband that we need a deep freezer and he keeps arguing that, no, in fact, we don't. But frankly, I'm tired of my vodka having to be removed from the freezer to fit the food in. Pffft!

    I look forward to the day when I can just veg with my girls and have a "spa" day. I'm trying to wait until they are a little bit older so I can introduce them to "Dirty Dancing" and "The Notebook".

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. When your drinks have to be removed in lieu of food, you KNOW it's time to get a freezer! What kind of crazy talk is that? Ground beef or Vanilla Rum? It's summer man! Pina Coladas need a place to live.

      I love Dirty dancing AND The Notebook. Makes some popcorn. I'm on my way...

      Delete
  5. Smiling. My method for choosing paint colors? Just pick one, paint it on, and eventually you'll grow used to it. Works every time!
    I, too, have a woodburning stove that needs to be cleaned and repaired. He can't do it when it's icy, or rainy, and there's no reason to do it when the weather's nice. Sigh.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. See, you're a smart painter, and obviously a good decision maker. I really do need to make some choices. The wall is starting to fade around the paint chips. They've been there THAT long.

      Lorinda, we have so much to do around the house; the seasons just go by too quickly. I've got to make a list!

      Delete
  6. That box of fudge thing was genius.

    And let me tell you how sickened I am this time of year when a local steak house holds it's Testicle Festival. Yes, they do. And yes, it's what you think.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He knows what he's doing, for sure. How can anyone be mad with a box of fudge?
      Testicle Festival? I need pics and a location. My son can call it a field trip :)
      I have a feeling there could be a week's worth of posts from the festival alone. Ugh.

      Delete
  7. I freaking LOVE this Fly On The Wall! OMG Michele, so many great conversations going on here. The fudge, Toddlers and Tiaras, the peeing dog about to lose his winker (we have that problem here too, BIG TIME)....I can't stop smiling. Now I KNOW I need to come visit you!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Get over here already! I need help with potty training Henry. It's a nervous peeing thing. Lila just looks at him like, "I want nothing to do with this..I'm innocent!". It's very much like the kids saying "I didn't do it!". The family keeps us on our toes. It's pretty wonderful when you think about it :) <3

      Delete
  8. OMG I'm glad I did not have to pee. You crack me up! I would love to stay at your house for a week. They say laughter is good medicine and great ab work. I think I could drop 20 or so :)
    Dawn
    Spatulas On Parade

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dawn, you are welcome to our crazy, anytime. I've learned to pee before reading other people's FLY posts. There is too much funny out there! So glad to have you join in. (Your asian chicken salad looks wonderful!)

      Delete
  9. I laughed till I choked, then I laughed some more. Thank you for sharing all these priceless moments.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ann, You always make me smile. Don't choke! I need you around!! <3

      Delete
  10. I'll have to add the fudge trick to my list. What? I don't know what list you are talking about. Hey, I got a pound of fudge for you...

    Thanks again for the Father's Day breakfast. Didn't know I was Denny's father but if I get a free breakfast out of it I'll take it.

    Actually, we better start shopping for a new fireplace soon because once it starts to get cold again we won't be able to get a deal and I won't feel right with it. Hate to have to wait a whole another year.

    By the way, rainbow dog poop doesn't smell any better than the regular stuff.

    Another great post. Love ya!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Denny's very well may be the answer to many of our problems (food problems). We will work on that fire plae soon. I'll have the walls painted by then. Or I'll just eat fudge. Who can tell.?

      Delete
  11. Double M... Gotta say: I just love what the "Fly On The Wall" reveals from the "M" household. I so "feel your pain," if you will, on the dog tales. You know I enjoyed!!!

    Have a great weekend, Slu

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. What's going on with the dogs, Slu? Even the kids eventually learned how to be potty trained... I'm actually throwing away a wool rug. I can't get the odor to go away. Boo!
      I am always glad to have you peak in the crazy. Your comments always make me smile :)
      Enjoy your Sunday,
      -MM

      Delete
  12. OMG...they were all so hilarious, but my fave was your 7yr old in the best day of his life eating the desserts from the freezer, LOLOLOL....of course, "what does it look like?" what equally hystrical.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The youngest always makes me laugh. The pinnacle of his world is desert :) Thanks for reading!

      Delete
  13. This was so funny. I love this fly on the wall. What a great house you live in.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Dawn. You need to come and participate with us soon! xox

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